I feel like I shouldn’t need to type these things out. All this info should be a given. You’re an adult with a job, you should know how to make contact politely. Alas, some of you seemed to have been raised by wolves so I give you my “Rules of Engagement” blog. I will accept no excuses from this moment on.
Raceplay (religion ≠ race)
Involving non-consenting parties
Anything Illegal ( including anything ending in "job")
1. I cannot stress enough: Read everything thoroughly before contacting me.
I provide all the information you need about me & how I do things in the form of a website. Go through every page before contacting me in any way. & thumb thru my twitter while you’re at it. My twitter is a great place to glean info about my personality & philosophies. If you still have questions after that they probably won’t be questions I’ll be annoyed to get.
2. No matter the circumstance, your first email should be an introduction.
I prefer you fill out the form I have provided for introductions. The form provides all the info I need but if you still feel the need to send an email, then you need to follow this template. I don't care if you just wanna buy an item or say hello. I need to know who you are (something I can call you!), what you want, your general demographics info (points for timezone), if you’re a BDSM newbie or a veteran. Telling me where you found me helps me with advertising logistics. If you have references, forward them along too. Save the long screeds & graphic fantasies until I give the ok.
3. Nothing is free.
I wouldn't give a strange man my time for free on the street, why would I do it here? I make it crystal clear how to send me tribute & payment so unless you have some outstanding circumstances or are established with me, you shouldn’t be sending me messages without a tribute attached. In-person sessions require deposit from new clients & only if you have some pressing concern should you be messaging me about a potential session without deposit attached.
If you’re not the best written communicator you can still take the time to proofread. Read your message aloud to be sure it makes sense. Proofread it as many times as it takes to get rid of glaring errors that make it difficult to understand. Thorough, spell-checked emails are not hard to write so when elements are lacking it makes the writer look lazy. Careless work reflects on the worker. If you appear careless when you should be trying to impress me, how do you expect me to take you seriously as a submissive?
Capitalization protocol is a nice way to remain in a submissive headspace but I don’t require it. I do not refer to myself with capital letters because I know what I am. I don’t feel the need to change my already stylized typing with redundant capitalizations. We both know where we stand, I don’t feel the need to use inconvenient trappings to reinforce it. That said, I do enjoy seeing submissives use it as another way to demonstrate their fealty. However, I’m not going to punish anyone for thinking it’s corny & I won't be typing stuff like "We/we" any time soon.
6. I don’t require all emails be in power-dynamic.
I’m happy to negotiate our scenes & future without any power dynamics in place. I actually prefer it for in-person sessions so that there can be no misunderstandings. I may be affable but I still expect respect.
While I’m not asking you to capitalize my pronouns, I do demand you message me with the respect you’d show any professional stranger & use my title. I enjoy most honorifics, I mostly use Mistress myself though I’ve enjoyed being called Goddess, Satan, Devi, etc & whichever resonates most with you, I’ll probably enjoy. Princess is the only caveat. Do not call me Princess. Queen is fine, Princess is somebody's daughter.
8. Not a submissive?
If you do not identify as a slave or submissive but are hoping to have a pain or fetish-centered session with me, email me with the same courtesy you’d use with a professional. I am an actual, real-live sadist so I usually accept pain sluts without hesitation as long as they are respectful & know better than to call me baby. I rarely accept fetishists who do not wish to include a power dynamic but if you’re respectful maybe I’ll consider your request.
9. I don’t believe in topping from the bottom but I do believe in pushy men.
Never type things like: “rules are” or “but i have to” “but you have to”- I realize you may have an elaborate fantasy you’re dying to live out but the power-exchange experience I provide is very real. I’m not a wind up toy. I will hear & consider ideas while in negotiation & session but ultimately I decide whether or not I want to enact them. I welcome ideas from my slaves & don’t consider them topping from the bottom. I, as the dominant, am still the only one who gets to decide if they come to fruition.
But I will never, ever tolerate being talked to like the hired help.
There you have it- the tools you need to take that first step towards salvation without pissing me off. Go forth edified.